The smart aleck's guide to American history

The earliest American settlers : brave, bold, and rich in minerals

The colonists are revolting

A nation declines to bathe

The Civil War : America's changing body

The gilded age (or, screw the poor)

World War I : "the war to end all wars"

The roaring twenties

The depressing thirities

World War II (out of ...?)

1947-89 : the "we didn't start the fire" era

And on into the future.